


Confession's Gamble

by uwujii



Series: Haikyuu Angst Week 2020 [8]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Love Confessions, M/M, Rejection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-08
Updated: 2020-11-08
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:41:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27452158
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/uwujii/pseuds/uwujii
Summary: Confessing's a gamble,Suna shouldn't have risked it.
Relationships: Miya Osamu/Suna Rintarou
Series: Haikyuu Angst Week 2020 [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1995433
Comments: 3
Kudos: 20
Collections: Haikyuu Angst Week 2020





	Confession's Gamble

**Author's Note:**

> Day 8 (Bonus): Tears

Suna Rintarou wasn't the type to show emotions. He always had a plain look on his face whenever people saw him; most they could catch was if he gave an annoyed look towards Atsumu.

He didn't like emotions. They were complicated, especially when love was involved. He saw how his teammates would get into relationships and end up hurting themselves. They would be out of it for a few days; not even Kita's intimidating aura fazed them. He didn't want to experience that; he didn't want to know what it felt to be loved or to be in love; he knew that even if it were romantic, he would end up getting hurt. So he avoided it like the plague.

But Osamu Miya was someone he couldn't ignore.

He wasn't like Atsumu, which Suna liked. Osamu was much more laid back than his loud, chaotic brother; he enjoyed Osamu's company. He talked about onigiri a lot, along with other recipes he'd found, and sometimes making fun of Atsumu because he had zero skills in the kitchen.

Suna liked listening to him talking about those things. He liked listening to him in general, really. His voice was calming; unlike his twin, he found it comforting. The way Osamu asked him if his practice sets needed more accuracy made him feel warm every time. He felt things when Osamu was looking his way, too. Sometimes, he'd get uncomfortable and get distracted during practice. He liked Osamu Miya.

He was conflicted when he realized that he liked Osamu. He didn't want to feel anything towards anyone. He had already planned it in his head that he wasn't going to catch feelings towards anyone to protect himself and save him from any future problems. His mind had its plans set out, but so did his heart.

His heart decided to fall for Osamu.

Their interactions that once didn't mean anything now meant so much to Suna. He loved Osamu's company; he always felt safe and calm around him, like nothing were to happen to him if he had completely fallen in love with him. Like he would take care of him if ever the universe gave them a chance to be together. Like Suna would never be hurt by him, albeit his thoughts on emotions and love.

Ever so slowly, he abandoned his old thoughts on both of those. He wanted to give it a try; he wanted to give emotions a try. He wanted to give love a try, thinking that maybe, just maybe, he wouldn't end up like the others. That his first love story was going to be successful, that it wouldn't end up in tears.

So, he continued to have feelings for Osamu. Day by day, it grew bigger and stronger. Suna showed in subtle ways that he liked him, like giving Osamu his water bottle other than him going over to get it on his own, or tossing a towel to Osamu for him to catch it perfectly. Sometimes, he was willing to ask Osamu to set to him a few times even after practice, but that was rare; he didn't want to be that obvious that he was trying to get closer. He sided with Osamu when they teased Atsumu, even giving him ideas on how to prank him too, and Osamu would always laugh and thank him for the idea before going on and doing it.

They weren't a lot to some, but it was so much for Suna. Every day he was happy to see Osamu; even if it came with Atsumu, he was learning to bear with him because if he wanted to be close to his brother, he'd have to collect all the patience in the world to deal with Atsumu.

At some point, he decided to confess. He was scared, but he was hopeful. He thought about it in his head; Osamu was the closest to Suna other than his own brother, they always sat next to each other anywhere during practice, they talked about literally anything under the sun, Osamu would always go first to Suna if there were something on his mind if it wasn't shareable to his twin. It gave Suna hope that maybe, Osamu liked him back.

It took him a while, but Suna gathered all his courage into setting a date and time in his head for him to confess. He knew he was ready to tell Osamu about his feelings, silently hoping that Osamu would feel the same, that he wouldn't be heartbroken. It was a gamble, and Suna wasn't the type to do that, but he was willing to take a step into uncharted waters for Osamu.

Oh, how his thoughts had changed. Before, he didn't want to experience love and all the other emotions it came with, but now, he was willing to take a risk for someone. He thought it was beautiful, but also stupid, but he had decided, and he didn't have the heart to back out, he was determined.

So one day, when they finished practice early, Suna called Osamu to the back of the gym. He told Osamu that he would show him something, and he followed. No one questioned why they went out of the gym together; everyone had noticed the subtle flirting for a long time now. The team knew well of Suna's feelings, even though he thought he was good at hiding it, the team noticed, especially because it took a whole lot for Suna to ask for extra more sets even after practice willingly.

"What did you want to show me?" Osamu rose his brow once they stopped walking. Suna looked at him; his usual bored eyes were nervous. He must've noticed when Osamu's eyes went wide and asked, "what's wrong?"

"I didn't ask you to come with me to show you something," Suna paused; he received a worried and confused expression on Osamu's face. "I have feelings for you, Osamu." The middle blocker closed his eyes while he said those words. Sure, he had the guts to tell him, but he was still scared of what would happen after. He didn't think about that.

"Suna," Osamu spoke, his voice soft. Suna was still scared to open his eyes; he was too scared to see Osamu's face. "Look at me," he spoke again, and this time, Suna slowly opened his eyes. He was met with Osamu's frown and a pitiful look in his eyes. Suna shrank; he wanted to run away and hide forever. He wanted to go back to his little bubble of security before his heart decided to pick Osamu to have feelings for.

When Osamu sighed, his heart broke. That was already an indication that he was rejected, that his feelings had no use whatsoever, that love was something that he shouldn't have gambled with. Suna's eyes were no longer nervous; the same uninterested look in his eyes was back; he shouldn't have tried with love.

"I'm sorry," Osamu told him, but Suna was in a state where he no longer cared. Well, he didn't want to care. He didn't want to feel the aching feeling in his chest, he didn't want to feel his fingers trembling behind his back, hidden, he didn't want to feel the tears threatening to fall, and he didn't want to feel the embarrassment and urge to hide forever. He wanted nothing to do with them, but he was experiencing everything.

"I know," Suna replied, a small, sad smile appearing on his face. "Thanks for listening to me, I guess." Suna walked past Osamu, tears at the corner of his eyes. He quickly made it to the gym, luckily his bag was near the door, so he took it without anyone noticing. Suna sped off, tears still threatening to fall like an old dam about to burst.

He dashed to his room when he got home, he locked it and sat on the end of his bed. The tears fell, and he couldn't stop. He hated the feeling of rejection; he hated how defeated he felt; he hated the way he both felt mad and sad; he has hated all these mixed things in his chest. He was overwhelmed. He regretted ever deciding to give emotions at try, giving love a try.

He shouldn't have tried; he shouldn't have gambled, and he shouldn't have fallen for Osamu. Because now that he did, and failed horribly, he was crying a dam of tears, and everything hurt.

**Author's Note:**

> aaaa last day! I hope everyone who read enjoyed (is this the right word for angst week? oop) my entries! Truth be told this is the first time I've written anything for Haikyuu so I hope I did them well :>


End file.
